statistic

we are just statistic in this big big world.

i think many get attached for the reason to feel the right to "feel important". its like we feel empty inside when we have no one to call to at night. more so when we don't have the right to blame people for being unavail to you whenever you want them to. we get attached for that right isnt it? the right to get angry at someone who doesnt call you for an extended period of time, sae like half a day.

i feel carefree sometimes not having that someone who has that right in my life. hahahah. but yet i feel empty sometimes not having that right over someone. get it? awesome phrase!

but then again, its not about the rights isnt it?

was just surfing friendster some time ago, (like 3 mins ago?) rightful intention was to find a fren's picture which i was going to intro to a guy, let's call him jay. hahahaa. so went to search right, and guess what we are all so inter related tt i happened to see sharlene's friendster right, and i was checking her site to find miss G's photo, haha. and i saw a photo of her with Mr skywalker! ok trust me on this ok. yes it din feel gd. but no i'm not in a state where i am still dwelling on it. that guy looks way to cute described by my GD fren miss A right. and i'm sure "different kind of shuai" was basically a cushion for my fall of ego. :) thanks miss A for being sensitive, diplomatic blah blah blah.

you know how people subtly reveal their life thru frenster and their blogs? go check out those frensters labelled "its complicated" and you'd see a pattern, they all dont really post their "complicated partner's" pictures! but yet, it never fails that there'd def be 1 or like a few of those, yet not like openly revealing that they'r like together, but yet subtly. ha. hint hint: look thru my blog. yah right. if i had a complicated partner at all, i wouldnt be blogging right now isnt it? last parade loh!

ok enough for 1 night. its already 142 am and i have to be a presenter tmr, a waiter tmr, a friend, a brother, and most of all, the very hard to be jianfeng. nighty nighty.

今天是外婆生日 我换上复古西装
载着外婆开着拉风的古董车兜兜兜风
车里放着她的最爱找回属于是她的时年代
往大稻埋码头开去把所有和外公的往事静静回忆
外婆她脸上的涟漪美丽但藏不住压抑失去了爱情
只盼望亲情弥补回应大人们以为出门之前桌上放六百
就算是孝敬一天到晚拼了命赚钱少了关怀有什么意义

外婆她的期待慢慢变成无奈大人们始终不明白
她要的是陪伴而不是六百块比你给的还简单
外婆她的无奈无法变成期待只有爱才能够明白
走在淡水河衅听着她的最爱把温暖放回口袋

记得去年外婆的生日表哥带我和外婆参加
她最最重视的颁奖典礼结果却拿不到半个奖
不知该笑不笑我对着镜头傻笑只觉得自己可笑
我难过却不是因为没有得奖而难过
我失落是因为看到外婆失落而失落
大人们根本不能体会表哥他的用心好像随他们高兴
就可以彻底的否定
否定我的作品决定在于心情
想坚持风格他们他们就觉得很欢乐
没惊喜没有改变我已经听了三年
我告诉外婆我没输不需要改变表哥说不要觉得可惜
这只是一场游戏只要外婆觉得好听那才是一种鼓励
外婆露出了笑容说她以我为荣浅浅的笑容就让我感到比得奖它还要光荣