happilyness

haha.

on the way down from the PEAK in Hong Kong, i imagined myself looking at the same scenery that probably just about a week ago, was enjoyed by jie wei and her friends.

and i was walking down this trail at night with a group of friends, and i started to think how happiness is such a process of back and forth in your heart. its a never ending cycle. you think you'd be happier like this, it doesnt happen, you wana get back, its not possible to move back. you move along and am afraid of looking back, living a life with certain regrets. the worse thing is to move along with regrets. you finally moved along, something changes in your life again. you wonder what decision you should make now, and you consider all the different scenarios that might happen, and realise that every one involves you feeling shitty about something. and you make a choice, knowing that you are trudging towards some form of unhappiness. yet there's nothing you could do. yes, with this, it is the optimal amt of happiness you'd get. yet, at those moments when you just feel shitty, you cant help but feel about this.

i thought i knew a lot. the more i knew, the more i realise i dont know. true for everything. i thought i was good.