已经

我们都长大了， 不是吗？
好像累积了好多的期望。

已经不能再写那种感动人心的话了
已经不能再像以前。。

ok i'm stuck.

'i thought you are the cool kind. don't spoil your image leh'

said by someone whom i'm sure wun read my blog. :)

the books are killing me. but for once i feel i'm pretty efficient with studies. or have i started with objectives tt were easy to obtain?

blogging in a war

interesting how it is while a verbal war is going in class.

old boy

beware! facebook. kills. relationships.

almost like people are sucked into this huge room and their clothes are sucked up leaving naked infront of each other.

a new era of disclosure and transparency. even the monks in some local are 'stripped' to show they are not business savvy people.

so much for the spilling effects of accountancy! who says the world doesnt need accountants?

my god, is this what a sememster of intense accounting mods have done to me? i cant even spell semester!

something's brewing...

money matters

how much is $4000?

is it worth a lot? it certainly can be seen as tt. at the very least it can be seen as a solution to my problem now. i applied for an exchange scholarship, which i thought would be pretty lifely to get since it considers family income in its selection. and i thought tt on paper i could be seen as one of the poorest in SMU, with 2 undischarged parents and all.

i din get it in the end. is tt the end of my exchange programme dream? nope. is tt a big difference? yes i guess. am i disappointed? yes. am i devastated? no. but am i disappointed? yes. this is the grip since i received the 'i deeply regret to inform you tt...' email. how could i have missed out on tt? i nearly pressed the reply button to type an email tt starts: may i know what is it tt got me out of consideration? is it my scholarship?

have i been greedy? i'm really not sure with tt. i really havent gotten anything i applied for so far in SMU. honestly. the single biggest consolation: my scholarship, i din apply for it.

is it some arch angel casting a shadow on me such tt all my applications wont ever get thru from now? what have i been doing wrong?

can i then just forget about everything tt i am planing to apply? or should i continue to try? i'm really thinking of how to get the job i like now. since all my applications for internships din really get thru. there must be something wrong. whats wrong?

this is really worrying me a lot.

where do i stand? i really wonder sometimes. sometimes i get the feeling tt pple think i am good. sometimes i get the feeling tt i am nothing in class. sometimes i think i think too highly of myself. sometimes i wonder if there are things tt i am unaware of myself. for example i have very little patience in listening to someone speak of something tt doesnt value add. and unawarenss of oneself is in my opinion the single biggest flaw tt anyone can have.

so ladies and gentlemen. if there ever is a kind soul out there reading this, you could really help me a lot by sending me an email and telling me truly about how you feel about me. as a person. gd say gd, bad say bad. i'd appreciate your comments more if they were true, which can tell me tt i'm a sucker at this and gd at tt. thank you so much.